Millions of men around the world are reportedly messaging each other about how to drug and assault their partners. You read that right: married men are asking other men for advice about how to violate their spouses undetected, even sharing videos of their wrongdoing.
CNN has flipped over another rock and found evidence of chat rooms where men upload videos of r*ping their partners while they’re out cold. It centers mostly on one site, which CNN says had 62 million views, mostly coming from IPs in the U.S.
Men’s initial reaction online? While many men are describing the network on Telegram as disgusting, and rightly so, some men are making it a game of statistics. As in, 62 million views, not 62 million men! It’s just another variation of the “not all men” trope. It’s pathetic.
I am beyond disgusted. There is no world where this behaviour is okay. I don’t care if your wife refuses to have sex with you, and quite frankly, if that’s the case, I’m not surprised. There is no justification for drugging and violating anyone, least of all a partner that’s supposed to feel safe around you.
Home is not always a refuge
Women are understandably enraged by this revelation, with some calling for the castration of men. It seems extreme, but I can’t say I blame them. Women quoted in the CNN article are traumatized beyond belief. If they’re not safe in a bed with their man, then who are they safe around?
The women say they feel ashamed that they had no idea what was happening to them. As if they should suspect their hubby is filming them explicitly without their consent, presumably for other men to get off to. Some women knew something wrong was happening, but without any video evidence, they might’ve been successfully gaslit.
Now they have lost all sense of trust around any man. And men are taking exception to that online, complaining they feel guilty until proven innocent. But they’re ignoring the fact that these women now see all men as a gun pointed at them, unsure if they’re loaded. That’s not just strangers in the night; these are men who shared marriage vows with them, men who live under a roof with their children.
This is not the first report about this kind of predation. We had Gisèle Pelicot, who was raped by more than 50 men at different times, invited by her husband while she was rendered unconscious. That case rattled a lot of people, showing that women cannot trust even their husbands. But while the site used in this case was taken down and the owner charged, it seems the lesson was washed away with the tide.
Make no mistake. These men are bonding online over assaulting their partners, even sharing tips on how to get away with it. A French lawmaker who was drugged by a former senator calls these networks “an online rape academy, where every subject is taught.”
One of the users unveiled by CNN is said to be selling “sleep liquids” that are meant to erase consciousness and memory of an assault. In fact, the source says that prescription drugs associated with sleep rape are getting harder to detect. Some victims report that police claim they were pretending to be asleep, as if part of some twisted roleplay scenario.
Men are not entitled to any woman’s body
In case any men are confused, marriage is not a license to SA your partner, although it is not always criminalized in some countries, including Malaysia and Algeria. With patriarchal values still holding in most of the world, the expectation to obey men is still prominent. If there’s any doubt about this, you can read about the recent “rape festival” in the town of Ozoro in Nigeria, with footage showing men chasing women through public streets. Some men defended it as “tradition.”
Yes, there were arrests in connection with some of these cases, including the “festival.” But an arrest after the fact does not protect women from physical and psychological harm, which can last for life. Believing women continues to be a barrier, as we can see plainly from the Epstein files cover-up. The list of men sharing sleep assaults should be released along with those who abused minors, the latter being actively suppressed by powerful men.
Adding more police is not the solution; boys must be taught that rape is a serious crime, and men must be taught that they are not entitled to women’s bodies–including their spouse. It doesn’t help at all that men are now using AI to undress girls and women without their knowledge, which is driving objectification without consequences.
As many people have pointed out on social media, until rape culture is dead, all men are presumed guilty. And for the men who don’t rape, it’s our job to ensure women are safe.
To read the full CNN report, click here.
